Sunday, June 14, 2009
Group 9 1.13
Many families experience the sadness and anger of having an alcoholic related to them. For instance: a parent, sibling, an aunt or uncle, maybe an alcoholic. When this person is close to you it may cause a lot of stress, emotional and/or physical pain in one’s life. Such as, when the alcoholic is in a drunken rage, or passed out and unable to function. This could cause some or most family members to have a growing concern about the alcoholic’s safety and/or the safety of others around them, an example a child or spouse. From just one person in the family that is an alcoholic, it may affect anyone and/or everyone around them. Many people conceder alcoholism to be a disease, some say it’s hereditary; in any case the alcoholic needs help. Therefore, it is very important to not take alcoholism lightly, and to encourage the alcoholic and his/her family to seek help whether it Alcoholic’s Anonymous or a treatment facility, or even Al-Anon meetings for the family members.
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That is such a sad and important topic. I liked how you used the word rage. To me it implied extreame anger and violence without the option for communication. I also liked how you included extended family in those it effects, such as aunts and uncles. The "for instance" and "such as" wording makes it feel a little off. Giving people resources in the conclusion was a great way to end this piece. - Kristy (Kristine)
ReplyDeleteYour topic just reminds me a real story about my own cousin in India. He fall in bad circle of friends, who encouraged him to start drinking. As far I know he was the most talented person in his whole family. A very smart person in study and sports. He couldn't quit or minimizing his drinking habit even after his marriage. He goes out every night with his friends to drink and come back home late night, and start fighting with wife and parents. One night he committed suicide by hanging himself with the fan. He die in his early 30's. It's a very tragic story and its all happen due to his drinking habit. Thanks so much to write something about alcoholism and its effect on family members.
ReplyDeleteWhat a great topic to keep the reader interested! So many people know something who is an alcoholic, my grandfather was and it just killed me watching him as i grew up! I think this topic could really touch the hearts of different people. I liked how you put the end of your paragraph explaining AA! Good job!
ReplyDeleteIt seems to me, judging from your topic sentence, that the paragraph should focus on examples of the "sadness" that "families" experience from alcoholism. However, this paragraph is more generalized than that; it talks about alcoholism in general--the consequences, the safety issues inolved and even the remedy. So I'm not sure if the paragraph really follows from your topic sentence here. I'm also noticing a couple fragments (the one beginning "For instance:" and the one beginning "Such as,") and comma errors as well--be careful to write in complete sentences.
ReplyDeleteYou picked a Great topic to write about as almost all of your readers can relate in one way or another. It sounds as if you have some personal experiences and are an advocate for the whole family to get help when one member of the family is inflicted with the disease. Some of the sentences are a little hard to follow, but a good paragraph all together.
ReplyDeleteThis is a very hard subject for a lot of people to talk about, but it's also something that shouldn't be left untouched. There are nice examples supporting why its difficult to have an alcoholic in the family. Everyone, if they think hard enough, can think of someone who is directly or indirectly related to alcoholism and has been effected by it.
ReplyDeletei agree wiht the teach on this one. If i just looked at your t.s. i would think i was about to read some examples of the effects it has had on someone and the sadness and anger these people felt. but i do feel like you did a good job everywhere else with that u had good examples and pretty strong concluding statement.
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